THE FAMILY WAY

In a world where hate seems to be the ruling force, it's nice to know that there's still such a thing as old-fashioned love, as this headline affirmed last week:

Woman plans to marry her father after two years of dating

I know what you're thinking: Thank God they didn't rush into this! Still, even before things started getting serious, they knew this wasn't "just one of those things":

The teenager said her father reached out to her on Facebook when she was in high school and soon after, she went to stay with him for a week. 

After the week together, the 18-year-old said they had sex and then started dating.

Maybe I'm just an old galoot, but in my day, we used to start dating, then have sex. And even then, that took at least... well, a week.

This romance started when the girl was 16 and Pops was around 36, long after he left her mother (before the girl was even born). Their age difference would probably infuriate progressives more than the incest angle, which they'd consider a "choice."

But if you find this whole thing revolting, well, you're clearly in the minority:

"Everyone on my mom’s side of the family sees us as father and daughter," she told the magazine. "Those who know that he’s my dad, and that we are engaged, include my father’s parents (they can see we are happy together and they can’t wait for us to have babies — they treat us just like any other couple), the woman we live with, and my best friend."

See? Not just the grandparents, but the woman these two lovebirds shack up with are down with the family nuptials. If only more marriages started out on such a positive note! (The magazine to which the quote refers is New York, which brought us a similar hard-hitting investigative piece, "What It's Like to Date a Horse."  And, lest you think otherwise, it isn't an interview with Mrs. Secretariat. I'm not sure when New York became the Appalachian version of Penthouse Forum, but I'm glad it was long after our subscription expired.)

I have a very strong feeling that, faster than you can say "I now pronounce you Dad and Wife," some cable network will be tracking down the happy couple with the idea of a new reality series. TLC has probably signed them already, being the home of such classy fare as My Five Wives, My 600-lb Life and Hoarding: Buried Alive. TLC officially stands for The Learning Channel, but appears to have morphed into Tacky Loathsome Creepy. Just the kind of stuff advertisers go for. (Looks like Kay's Jewelers is going to have to alter its jingle to "Every kiss begins with kin.")

And if you're wondering what kind of low-rent, backwoods, hominy grits kind of place would bless this kind of union, be forewarned: 

 
After the wedding, the woman says they plan to move to New Jersey where adult incest is legal.

You might find this piece of news shocking. But look on the bright side -- it's just one more reason to avoid New Jersey.

                                                 *************************