Monday, January 9, 2017

BREAKING NEWS: GOLDEN GLOBES EDITION

Hollywood is still buzzing about Meryl Streep's attack on President-Elect Donald Trump while accepting a lifetime achievement award at last night's Golden Globes awards.

"Unbelievable!" said one insider. "To think of the courage it took to complain about Trump in a room full of show business professionals -- in Hollywood! And on prime-time TV yet! Usually you have to wait until the late night talk shows for that kind of thing."

Another show business personality, who wished to remain anonymous for fear of reprisal, admitted, "Frankly, I don't think I'd have had the courage to remind people that we people in the entertainment world are all that's keeping America from watching football and mixed martial arts 24/7. Or being overrun by people -- and I use the word 'people' loosely -- who eat tuna out of a can, or will never know the difference between Moscato and Gew├╝rztraminer."

A talent manager who was sharing lines of cocaine with the personality added, "Tell me about it. I mean, farmers are OK when they're doing their job. And people who live in small towns probably do something that make their lives worth living. But please, keep them away from the voting booths!"

The manager's friend shivered from a sudden rush before nodding vigorously in agreement. "Did you know," he asked rapidly, "that if only people in New York and California voted, Hillary Clinton would have won? Can't there be a constitutional amendment to keep everyone else from voting?"

The talk, however, soon got back to Ms. Streep. "She's got guts, that's for sure," said the manager, as he rubbed what was left on the silver tray across his gums. "There they were, the people she works with and the critics who gave her the award -- and she said, without any fear in her voice, exactly what she was thinking about Trump, and the hell with what anybody thought about it. It was so unexpected. My hat's off to her. Wait a minute, is that sexist?"

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