Tuesday, February 28, 2017


It all translates to "Yeah, baby!"
While American politicians are arguing about whether workers should have affordable insurance and a salary that can cover gratuities like food, a council member in Sweden wants employees to have daily one-hour paid sex breaks. And you were grateful for two 15-minute coffee breaks!

Just to make it clear, Per-Erik Muskos, the council member who broached the idea, isn't suggesting that workers have sex with each other. That's a good thing for some of us. I mean, Playboy was never going to run a "Women of..." pictorial about my old job. 

No, Muskos wants people to go home to their partners for their recreational recess. Depending on how friendly your secretary is, his proposal might not be the largess it seems to be. 

On the other hand, people who say they wouldn't have sex with their spouse if you paid them will now have to put their money where their mouth is. But for jokers like me, we've got another sexy come-on to the little lady: Hey sweetie, why don't we punch the clock, heh heh!

"C'mon, babe, it'll be good for you."
While Muskos claims that he advocates sex breaks strictly for health reasons -- e.g., lower blood pressure, better memory -- his photos suggest that it's the only way he's ever getting laid. Ironically, most women's blood pressure would probably go through the roof if they had an easier time remembering they were intimate with this oaf. 

Muskos admits that this perk would operate strictly on the honor system:

There's nothing like the image of an assassinated
president to get you in the mood.
"Trust their employees" -- you can tell this guy lives in the fairytale kingdom of Sweden. Otherwise, if bosses were like their American counterparts, they'd be screaming, "Olaf, what do you mean by feeding the squirrels instead of sticking it to your wife like you're being paid to?"

As I think of it, Swedish cities must be pretty small that workers can go home, undress, have foreplay, do the deed, and get back to the desk within an hour. Most New Yorkers would consider it a win if they made it  back to their nearest subway stop in that amount of time. 

Otherwise, the only way I see this lagniappe working successfully is if couples telecommute. It'll give new meaning to the typical husband's demand, "C'mon, baby, gimme a break!"


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