Sunday, October 25, 2015


Applebee's has apologized to an autistic man who was allowed to work as a prep cook at one of their Rhode Island restaurants for a year without being paid. 

"This was terribly unfair," said spokesman Brad Lanes. "Had we known this was happening, we would have made the same deal with the rest of the staff."

Chaffee plans on returning to his previous job as a prep cook at Applebee's. "And this time," he added angrily, "I better get paid!"

Zuckerberg then announced that he now owns the copyright on Mandarin.

A friend of Hall's admitted, "Jerry told me that Rupert is everything she wants in a man. He's rich, decades older, and looks like a pterodactyl."

On the positive side, aides admitted it was his most coherent policy statement so far.


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