Monday, December 5, 2016


Disgraced former Congressman Anthony Weiner, who recently left a rehab clinic for cybersex-addiction treatment, is calling friends in the restaurant business for a job.

Insiders say Weiner is leaning toward a Chinese restaurant since he's famous for his pulled pork.

A half hour later, Chang-Kuei was hungry to die again.

Emma Morano, who recently turned 117, is believed to be the last person alive to have been born in the 1800s. Morano has a daily diet of biscuits and two raw eggs, never touches fruits or vegetables, doesn't get out of bed, hasn't left her house in 20 years, is very deaf and blind, and spends most of her time sleeping. 

Asked what she attributes to living so long, Morano replied, "You call this living?!"

Unfortunately, that includes remembering who they had sex with.

In his honor, a 21-gun salute was fired in a jail cell filled with dissidents.


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