NOT A CARE IN THE CYBERWORLD

I don't even care that I couldn't draw a
more professional-looking X.

One of the few joys of getting older is the gradual lack of caring about most everything that drives the rest of the world into a dither. To paraphrase Bobby Kennedy, some people see things as they are and ask Why? I see the same things and ask Who gives a shit? 

Last week, way too many people reacted to Kirstie Alley's flippant tweet regarding the death of Stephen Hawking: You had a good go at it..thanks for your input

Leaving aside the hinky punctuation and syntax, what made the angry cyberfolks look silly was that they were "righteously" complaining about a comment by a washed-up celebrity whose last hit series ended a quarter-century ago. And not just a comment, but something called a "tweet" about a scientist they never would have heard of if he didn't have what will soon be referred to as Stephen Hawking's Disease if they have their way.

Yup, people really do listen to her.

I don't know why the smartest guy in the universe needed defending from comment by a has-been best known today as a symbol of a Hollywood-based cult religion. These same Twitter warriors probably bought Hawking's A Brief History of Time, and never got past the second page because it was a science book. (In the '80s, they also bought Salmon Rushdie's The Satanic Verses because they were striking a blow against terrorism at 20% off in Barnes & Noble.)

Even sillier -- if her comment had been written by, say, Albert Brooks, it would have earned a chuckle or two, because ultimately it's all about the tweeter, not the tweet. Or, in Kirstie Alley's case, the eater and the eats.

Simultaneously with Alley's eulogy, Republicans were ready to lynch Jim Carrey over his Twitter feed -- not  just for a comment, but his painting of White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders (left).

Or was it? According to Jim, it was merely "a so-called Christian whose only purpose in life is to lie for the wicked." While I'm not familiar with her religion, both the portrait and description could point to lawyer Blair Berk (right). Berk's clients include Harvey Weinstein and Mel Gibson.

Whose only purpose in life is to lie for the wicked. Go ahead, tell me that painting couldn't be her.

But just to go with the flow, let's say it really is Huckabee-Sanders. Why did people get so riled up over the political equivalent of a fourth-grader's drawing of a witch titled My Teacher?
 Jim Carrey, remember, is best known for a movie called Dumb and Dumber. His latest project, a Polish production called Dark Crimes, will go direct to video this spring after sitting on the shelf for two years.

 Most alarmingly, his recent appearances suggest either an alcoholic gas station attendant on the night shift, or the next Charles Manson. And let's not forget Jim's own history with women. Take away his celebrity, and you'd cross the street if you saw him walking toward you.

My favorite song.

Yes, he's a funny guy, who happens to be a marginally good self-taught painter. But you know what? There's probably someone down your block who fits the same description that you're never going to follow on Twitter or Facebook, or listen to when he's mumbling to himself on the checkout line at your local grocery store.

But because Jim Carrey and Kirstie Alley lucked out when it came to career moves, their opinions are now worthy of national debate. And ironically, the same people who constantly gripe about celebrities spouting off their opinions are the first to listen to them. Thank God there was another high school shooting today to drive Jim and Kirstie off everybody's newsfeed. Until the next time they say something.

And to those who took offense at a two-bit blogger with zero power cracking wise about Carrey and Alley's looks: Why?

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