BLIND, DEAF AND DUMB DATE

Victim: a person harmed, injured, or killed as a result of a crime, accident, or other event or action. synonyms: sufferer, injured party, casualty

Chris Rock once said it was a father's job to keep his daughter off the stripper pole. I agree. It's also a father's job to encourage his daughter to use common sense, and not get herself into situations that will prove to be fodder for wisecracking bloggers.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, from the London Telegraph I offer Exhibit A:

A Frenchman masquerading as a 37-year old "male model" offering women 50 Shades of Grey-type sex dates in the dark is facing rape charges after they belatedly discovered he was a short, fat and balding 68-year old. 

I feel compelled here to say that rape isn't funny, never was, and never will be. Rapists are hideous people who should face the full force of the law. There is no excuse for rape. 

Having stated the obvious, let us continue with the story:

 

A man calling himself Anthony Laroche attracted much female interest on several dating websites after depicting himself as a young, mysterious prince charming with a photo highlighting his smouldering gaze, square jaw and designer stubble. 

Surely you must be asking yourself: Wouldn't these women have been able to tell the difference when he showed up on their first date? Not if they had walked into this situation with their eyes open:

Adding spice to the proceedings, "Anthony" proposed a "blind" date in which the two total strangers had sex in the dark on their first encounter at his flat in Nice, southern France. 

Ah. That explains it. Now it all makes sense.

One step away from an orgy.

This wasn't just a one-off thing. Going back to 2009, there were at least 200 women who willingly took part, ranging in age from 25 to 50, which certainly qualifies as "old enough to know better." Laroche is now being charged with "rape by surprise," which sounds like a Lenny Bruce routine about a '50s game show. 

Parents are quite rightly encouraged to raise their sons to respect women, and to refrain from abuse of all kinds. But I find it rather sad that I feel obliged to tell my 19 year-old daughter, For God's sakes, don't have blindfolded sex on your first date with a stranger you met online!

  

If you want to look at this crime another way, simply reverse the sexes: A 68 year-old woman convinces men over half her age to have blindfolded sex with her, since they think she's a 37 year-old stunner.

Suddenly, "rape by surprise" becomes Ha! Stupid men, they'll do anything for sex! Matt Lauer smirks his way through the story. Conan O'Brien and Jimmy Kimmel make jokes for their whoo-whooing audiences. Melissa McCarthy changes the senior citizen to a fat woman for her next movie. Hilarity ensues.

Society would consider the man a victim only in Google's second definition of the word: 

a person who is tricked or duped. "the victim of a hoax." Synonyms: loser, prey, stooge, dupe, sucker, quarry, fool, fall guy, chump

I propose a third definition: A person who needs to be saved from his or her own stupidity.

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