THEY SPY WITH THEIR LITTLE EYES

"Welcome to Wegman's! Now give up your
privacy."

Since controversy is America's default mode these days, it  comes as no great shock that even grocery shopping is now also cause for its second favorite mode, backlash. To quote the Spectrum News Staff (a fancy phrase for A.I.), Wegmans says it has deployed cameras equipped with facial recognition technology at some stores to help identify individuals who have been flagged for misconduct. 

In its official press release, Wegman's refers to these "individuals" as "persons of interest", which is more police-speak than you would expect when picking up a bag of tangelos. 

Multiply by 12 and you'll get the idea.

Now before shoppers feel like aisle five is going all Twilight Zone/Law & Order, let me remind you I went through this biometric jazz at least twice while doing background work, and not only survived, but received an extra $50. And there were about 100 tiny cameras taking pictures while lights were flashing. At Wegman's, you probably won't even see the cameras!

Of course, what I did was strictly voluntarily, while Wegman's gives you no choice. Instead of giving you an extra stipend, they'll probably raise their prices to pay for the equipment, too. And those early reports of collecting "eye scans" and "voiceprints"? Just a little misunderstanding, folks, as Wegman's "does not currently collect" that kind of data (emphasis added for a good chortle). 

Concerned that the customers' data will be stored in a Wegman's cloud somewhere in Ashtabula? Not to worry! "Data is kept only as long as necessary". Just what qualifies as necessary hasn't been determined yet. But no worries, it probably won't be forever. Just... a while.

And hey, lots of you Wegmanners have nothing to worry about since only "a small fraction" of its 100 stores will have this technological wonder. So that means, what, only 2%? Seven? 15% still sounds small. Even if it's 25%, that means there's a 75% chance you're in the clear. If they're telling the truth.

Only in New York do people line up around the
block to buy half a roast chicken and prepared
mashed potatoes.

Not that you're going to know anyway, since they're not telling you if your Wegman's is doing it -- unless you live somewhere like New York City, where such signage is mandatory. And yes, the Wegman's in Manhattan and Brooklyn have it. (I don't shop at the Manhattan outlet since it's not worth the nearly 80-block subway ride to get there, no matter what Wegman's fanatics say.)

Somewhere I read the real reason for the data collection was to keep track of your purchases. If that was the case, I wish my Upper East Side grocery stores would do it. My wife goes through kombucha like I do B-movies. And not just any kombucha but Synergy Kombucha. And not just any flavor of Synergy Kombucha, but Pure. 

My wife would
tear this off the
laptop if she could.

Whole Foods carries Pure, but it's usually the first flavor that sells out. If they had the voiceprint data collection, maybe management would hear me mutter, Boy, I wish to hell they'd stock more Pure instead of those stupid flavors like Island Bliss, Peach Paradise, and Living in Gratitude! NOBODY buys those unless Pure is sold out! 

Fairway, which is a few blocks closer, stocks Synergy... EXCEPT PURE! Maybe they'd get the hint when I grouse, They've got Mystic Mango, Strawberry Serenity -- even Cosmic Cranberry! How difficult is it to order something as simple as Pure?! I'd buy it here instead of Whole Foods to avoid the extra walking distance!

Whole Foods and Fairway could keep my data until we elect a Muslim Asian-American Socialist Democrat for President if they would just make things easier for me when it came to Pure. They wouldn't even have to pay me an extra 50 bucks to smile for their spycams. Although for what they're charging for that kombucha swill, it would sure put a dent in my grocery bills.

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