UPPER EAST PROTEST

It was only after helicopters had been hovering overhead for about a half hour yesterday afternoon that I realized something unusual was happening in my sleepy neighborhood. Had I been an air raid warden in World War II, we'd be speaking Japanese in Yorkville now.

                                      

Knowing that protests had been scheduled for New York, I tuned into MSNBC. Sure enough, Katy Tur was embedded with marchers. Now, you have to understand that most of these protests have happened between the West Village and West 57th Street. But now I saw the Queensborough Bridge behind Katy. That was the Upper East Side.

Not just the Upper East Side, but 1st Avenue. These folks were headed our way -- or, rather, toward Gracie Mansion (the home of Bill de Blasio), because there's nothing else up here they would find interesting. Unless they wanted to stop off at the 2nd Avenue bars that have been turned into storefront gin mills for pedestrians.

Before you could say "No justice, no peace," I was outside my building, running up my block to York Avenue and, looking south, saw the marchers walking across 79th Street to East End Avenue. 

Headed toward Gracie Mansion, just as I called it! Somebody get me a job at CNN.

I ran to East End, then made a right toward 83rd Street, where the protesters appeared to be briefly flummoxed by the temporary fencing that had been set up for pedestrians during the COVID-19 pandemic. Industrious people that they were, the guys in the front of the march moved the fences to one side to allow the rest walk through.

You have to understand, we're not used to this kind of riffraff in our pastoral neighborhood, which perhaps why so many locals came out to watch. Unlike the opportunists who have been coming out at night like life-draining vampires, the protesters were a peaceful bunch. They were shouting all kinds of rhythmic statements, often aimed at the police, and waving signs with comments usually not mentioned in polite circles.

Wanting to keep up with the march, but having no desire to actually get in the middle of it, I waited for a brief opening before running across the street and onto the path running along the East River, before heading north toward Gracie Mansion. 

Hey Skippy, who you lookin' at?

At one point, there's a semi-circular stone stairway that goes to street level, where, by odd coincidence, a fashion shoot was in process. 

The juxtaposition between what was happening there and on the street would be hooted off a movie screen as being too cliched to be believed. I waited until I was further away to snap a photo (enlarged for detail) to capture the moment.

The police can be outnumbered 1,000 to 1, and they'll still hold the line.

The police had closed off East End Avenue at 87th, preventing the protesters from parking themselves outside Gracie Mansion. (Mayor de Blasio was probably on a treadmill at his Brooklyn gym, anyway.) 

They came to a halt at the corner of 86th, where they sat or kneeled, while listening to a speaker who couldn't be heard over the four helicopters overhead. 

Afterwards, the protesters stuck around for another 15 minutes or so, trying to figure out their next move. One fellow, no older than 18, tried to get a round of "Abolish prisons!" going, but, lacking a hook, it fizzled out pretty quickly. However, a rousing chorus of 'NYPD suck my dick!" caught on pretty quickly, particularly when police lined up at the entrance of Carl Schurz Park to prevent anyone from entering. (You can hear it really get going near the end of the following video.)

Yup, it was the language we proper Upper East Siders aren't used to. The homemade signs (where do they find all that cardboard to write on?) also gave plenty of food for thought. One, featuring a caricature of a pig wearing a police hat, read "ASESINS PD." Either the sign was too small to fit "ASSASSINS", or the COVID-closing of schools happened before the spelling exam.

More interesting commentary came from a sign reading, "KEEP YOUR MOUTH OFF OF BLACK DICK AND SHUT ABOUT BLACK LIVES." Well. That says it all. The most poignant message came from a young woman asking people not to take pictures of their faces because it was their march. Since most were wearing protective masks, it really wouldn't have made a difference. However, their social distancing skills left a lot to be desired.

And then, like a blizzard that threatens to drop two feet of snow but disappears before you've had a chance to get the shovel ready, 10,000 protesters were on their way across 86th Street, with a line of police cars following them. They were loud, they were crude, they were peaceful. No violent footage would appear on the news. 

Two important things I took from my time on East End Avenue yesterday: 
1) The real protesters aren't criminals. The opportunists come out at night.
2) If you park under a tree, your car will get covered in birdshit.

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