STRIKEOUT

They still use fountain pens?

 The Writers Guild strike is a bittersweet thing for me. Writers have always gotten the shaft when it comes to credit, creative freedom, and money; all of that and more are on the line with streaming and cable decimating residuals, and production companies cutting the episode numbers. Writers have no choice but to strike, and I hope they get everything they're asking for, no matter how long it takes.

On the other hand... I'm a background actor. No productions mean no work for human props like me. Most if not all the New York work has been shut down. What's left is being filmed in New Jersey, where, apparently, the pickets aren't as formidable. Yet one series, filmed at a high school, is being co-picketed by many of the students. Their view of labor rights will change once they go to college and get their MBAs. 

Walking in circles seems an apt metaphor for
this strike.

Wanting to see the strikers myself, I went on the WGA website to find Monday's picket sites. (They also helpfully provide several strike chants to "demonstrate your union solidarity". Hey, can't the writers come up with their own?) The most convenient one to me was at Radio City Music Hall, where writers were out in semi-full force for NBC's Upfronts, the annual event when the network gives prospective sponsors a sneak peek at its mediocre fall  schedule.

The leader of the pickets was leading the chant, "Hey hey ho ho, we're not gonna write your show!" It wasn't as clever as a sign reading, DON'T PISS ON MY LEG AND TELL ME IT'S STREAMING!, but at least it rhymed. Jimmy Fallon, Seth Meyers, and the Saturday Night Live cast were nowhere to be found. Were they fine-tuning their own signs? Looking for the best hiking shoes to support them for hours on the strike line? Wait, I know: the only people taking pictures of the strikers were people like me rather than the press! 

"OK, Tina, five more minutes then it's lunch at
the Rainbow Room."

Here's how it works. The WGA picket lines attract celebrities who are "standing with" the writers, although that seems to mean only as long as there are paparazzi recording their "involvement". Many of the celebs, like WGA members Tina Fey and Seth Meyers, have some skin in the game. But not so much skin they show up with their writers after the first week. 

The late-night talk show writers make $40,000 to $50,000, give or take a few thou, compared to the $10 to $18-million going into the hosts' coffers. Granted, those writers probably can't imitate Neil Young the way Fallon does, or have Colbert's interviewing skills. But, boy, that is a hell of a salary disparity -- especially when these hosts all claim they wouldn't have a show without the writers, who were gifted with free waffles for one day by their bosses. (Maybe a little protein next time?)

All yentas look alike to me.

Then there are people you likely didn't know relied on writers, like those picket line-crossing women from The View. That's right -- the hosts known for "spontaneous" yammering need writers to say something complicated like, "Our next guest is currently starring in...". Keep that in mind the next time you think somebody must be really smart if they're on TV. 

The last writers strike lasted over 100 days; this one is predicted to go longer. While the writers deserve what they're demanding, many of them will never make up for what they lost during this time. Fallon and his brethren will manage to get by, as will the bigmouths of The View. I guess they really are smart if they're on TV. 

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