OVERHEARD IN NYC, PT. 2

As my creative block -- or disinterest -- continues, I've come to rely on my fellow New Yorkers for material. Here are a few I've been able to remember, or to enter into my Notebook app. All dialogue is, unfortunately, quite real.


GROCERY STORE, YORK AVE & 79TH ST. Two adult women, one older than the other:
YOUNGER: Where's the things?
OLDER: The things?
YOUNGER: The things you put the stuff in.
OLDER: You mean the bags?

OFFICE SUPPLY STORE, LEXINGTON & 87TH ST. 70ish woman at checkout counter, returning items, to manager:
"Could you help us? I have a fractured vertebrate and can't stand long."

CENTRAL PARK. One 30ish woman to another: 
"Jews can't hold their liquor."

CARL SCHURZ PARK. One 20-something to another: 
"Imagine if we had dinner with Neil Patrick Harris"

CARL SCHURZ PARK. Old man to old woman:
OLD MAN: "I'm 83 years old. I'm a Holocaust survivor. I was seven."
OLD WOMAN: "I'm 100 years old. I hate it."

Same old woman to friend: 
"It's really hot today. But I think it's cooler."

UPPER EAST SIDE. 40ish man on cell phone: 
"He knows an anesthesiologist, but he doesn't know a mechanic?"

EAST 85TH ST. 60ish woman to friend: 
"He lives next door to a poke restaurant, he'll never eat at home."

FIRST AVENUE BUS. 20-something woman to a friend:
 "I have a really good picture of her, stupid and drunk."

EAST 91ST STREET, 30ish woman on cell phone:
"I'm on Ninety-Onest Street."

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The previous "Overheard in New York" can be found here.