BOBBY BEAR

He thinks if he says it enough, it's true.

 Over the weekend near the Museum of Modern Art, I saw a line of flatbed
trucks with LED signs reading ONLY KENNEDY CAN BEAT TRUMP.  Considering that the only Kennedy known to have a worm in his brain is roughly 40% behind the former president in the polls, I can only assume that the fine print on the sign completes the sentence as IN SHEER NUTTINESS. And even then, that would be up for debate.

Until this morning. Who among you had RFK JR, DEAD BEAR, and CENTRAL PARK on your bingo card? If so, you have the luck of the Irish, something that the Kennedy family ironically lacks. 

If he becomes president, this
will be his official portrait.

I don't know how I had forgotten about a dead bear cub found in Central Park in 2014. Maybe the inauguration of our former idiot mayor Bill de Blasio that same year knocked even an event like that out of my head. And if you lived in New York at that time, you'd understand.

If you or I had encountered a bear carcass along a country road, we would have likely slowed down, maybe take a picture, and continue on our way, secure that we had a brief but semi-interesting story to tell that evening over dinner with friends.

But since this is RFK, Jr. -- remember, a worm-brain -- he decided to toss it in the trunk with the idea of bringing it home, skinning it, and putting the meat in the freezer. After posing for a gag photo first. Kenndy sense of humor: dead baby cub = sight gag.

His meandering excuse for eventually dumping it in Central Park gets more bizarre and, frankly unbelievable as it goes along (especially when he claims not have been drinking at the time) but makes perfect sense to his audience of one, Roseanne Barr. You're not surprised they're friends, are you? (If you haven't read his explanation yet, you can find it in Variety.) 

That is some funny stuff there.

And just to show you what a halfwit this guy is, he claims to have been surprised that a
bear carcass in Central Park was a "funny" idea, and to have been surprised it made the news the way it did. Just like his uncle and father were stunned the way Marilyn Monroe's death hit the front pages, I'm sure.

The New Yorker article featuring the bear-in-the-park story also mentions that RFK, Jr. -- despite those LED trucks claiming his odds otherwise -- called Donald Trump, angling for a job running the Dept. of Health & Human Services in the latter's second term. Because who else is more qualified for the post than someone who would likely ban vaccines yet sticks his fingers in a dead bear's mouth? 

In case you'd like a souvenir as well.

But, to his credit, just to show you how much he cares, he would have taken the job despite telling a friend that Trump was a sociopath, barely human, and the worst president ever. With that kind of spine, I guess the worm-brain is fit for politics after all.

                                                                                                                            

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