BREAKING NEWS: JOE BIDEN EDITION

Gaffe-prone Vice-President Joe Biden is coming under fire once more for a series of recent verbal missteps. Recently, he had to apologize to the Ant-Defamation League for calling unscrupulous money-lenders "shylocks." The same week, he referred to Asia as "the Orient."

Biden brushed off concerns that these and other misfires were going to hurt his chance at winning his party's presidential nomination in 2016. "That rumor must have been started by some stupid Polack. There's not a Chinaman's chance I'm in trouble. That boy in the Oval Office has put his full faith in me. The idea that people are taking offense is like saying an Irishman goes home sober every night. I mean, you've gotta be some kind of dumb blonde to believe it."

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